English
At some point in everyone's life, a need arises to form new friendships or, at the very least, integrate successfully into a new team.
You're probably worried about this - and that's absolutely normal! Especially if you need to change schools in the middle of the academic year and are concerned about fitting in with an already established group and whether they will accept you. You've never interacted with anyone at school, but now you want to change that. Here are several proven ways to make friends. Feel free to start with what resonates with you the most!
Method No. 1. Join a club, team, or project
Aside from during breaks, finding a moment to get to know your classmates or engage in conversation can be challenging. It can also feel quite awkward to approach someone in front of others or search for an excuse to strike up a conversation. It's often easier to identify potential friends in informal settings; they provide an excellent opportunity to discover common interests and start conversations. We're talking, of course, about extracurricular activities-such as joining the dance club or basketball team or collaborating on a science project for a school exhibition.
Opting for extracurricular activities at school ensures you surround yourself with like-minded individuals. Be sure to select an activity that genuinely interests you; if you enjoy an active lifestyle, consider exploring sports associations. Simultaneously, debate clubs can enhance your communication skills. Approach your teacher or classroom supervisor and inquire about what opportunities they have for school leisure activities.
Our online "Freedom of Communication" course will help you quickly find new friends. It will teach you not to be afraid of new acquaintances and loneliness, discover ways to connect with diverse individuals, enhance your understanding of your own and others' emotions, and even step into a leadership role within the class!
Method No. 2. Participate in school events (or even help organise them!)
This method follows on from the previous one. Where could it be easier to start a conversation than at a noisy and fun event or during its organisation, when together you carry heavy decorations onto the stage and constantly drop them? Keep an eye on the calendar for upcoming school holidays and events, and consider whether you could lend, if not a physical, then a creative hand. Frequently, people need someone to create posters for festivals or stage events. Approach the person responsible (teacher or student) and ask to participate.
If this feels overwhelming, consider attending these events without rushing home immediately. Participating in football matches, plays, fairs, discos, and balls is an essential aspect of teenage life; get involved. Even if you don't meet anyone, at least you'll gain new experiences!
Method No. 3. Use social networks
Nothing is easier than meeting people on social networks, where you certainly won't have to stumble from embarrassment or struggle to find your own words. Nearly every school maintains its own Facebook groups or general chat channels. Join these groups and occasionally comment on posts or other people's messages without being intrusive. For instance, participate in polls by sharing your favourite movie or support a classmate venting about a difficult teacher in the chat. Likewise, potential classmates can be added as friends and like and comment on their photos and posts. For instance, when you see a picture of people playing football on Instagram, you can comment, "Wow, do we have a similar playground or matches at our school? I'd love to try it too!" Demonstrate friendliness and genuine interest in your classmates' lives and hobbies; eventually, you'll naturally engage in a conversation.
There are special mobile apps you might find useful for making friends and discovering local parties or events, such as "Meetup" or "Nearify." There are also "Friender" or "Bumble BFF"-applications similar to Tinder, only tailored specifically to finding a friend, not a partner. They will choose a match for you based on your interests! This is ideal if you have moved to a new city/area.
Method No. 4. Approach someone who is sitting alone
Consider approaching a classmate who consistently eats lunch alone or sits on a bench listening to music instead of joining others in a volleyball game. They might be in a similar situation to yours. Maybe they also missed the moment when everyone paired up or formed groups. Or they just might be new, having moved to school shortly before you. Seeking out such individuals and getting to know them benefits others and you. Likewise, initiating a conversation with an individual is often easier than approaching an entire group. If you notice someone who already has friends at school but is alone, approach them and start a conversation. Perhaps later, that person might introduce you to their other friends. Before you know it, you'll become part of a larger social circle!
You can begin by saying, "Is this seat taken?" and sit beside them. From there, ask something simple but engaging, but something you can chat about: "Is this your casserole with cottage cheese? And how is it? I thought about having it, but I was unsure if it was tasty" or "Are these pins with characters from a video game? How long have you been playing it?"
Method No. 5. Provide a helping hand
Do you notice that your classmate does not have a pen? Offer one of yours from your pencil case! Did someone accidentally drop their notebooks in the middle of the corridor? Are their tights torn? Do they have a headache? Offer your help. Being kind and considerate is an effective way to make friends and stand out, especially since teenagers may hesitate to express sympathy or excessive politeness. Suppose you notice someone struggling with a problem; consider offering to buy them lunch or assisting them in finding a solution. The key is to pick the right moment and avoid rushing to help when it's unnecessary. Pay attention to the conversations around you and observe so you don't overlook any opportunities.
A guide to getting to know each other properly to win them over instantly
Imagine stepping into the classroom, where new faces surround you. Perhaps you've initiated a conversation during a break. No one here knows you yet, so what should you do to make a good impression and be liked instantly?
Step 1: Introduce yourself
It seems that this is obvious, right? Unfortunately, many forget this step, mumble their name, or skip it altogether, rushing into requests or questions. Also, many people neglect to talk about themselves, which can hinder connection and memorability. Introduce yourself by sharing your name and mentioning where you transferred from. Then, explain why you chose this class, such as your interest in literature. The main thing is to keep the introduction brief-just two or three sentences will suffice. Make sure to inquire about everyone's names and try to remember them. Incidentally, psychologists have found that people tend to enjoy hearing their own names! Therefore, try to call your classmates by their name more often.
Step 2: Make eye contact and smile
This is known as 'body language'-our gestures, posture, and hand movements during a conversation. Maintain an open posture during conversations-avoid crossing your arms over your chest or your legs on the chair. Stand comfortably, maintain eye contact with your conversation partners, and smile. Try to appear approachable and friendly. We also feel more confident when we smile and look good, so before you meet someone, look in the mirror just in case!
Step 3: Give a compliment
Find one person from the group (if you are not communicating one-on-one) and compliment them. It's unnecessary to delve into deep or serious compliments; a passing remark like, "Wow, that's a cool backpack" or "You did an excellent job with your presentation in class" is sufficient. Avoid outright flattery and focus on praising things you genuinely like. Using a compliment as an icebreaker can lead to a conversation. For instance, if you follow up with, "Where did you purchase that backpack? I've been searching for a similar one for quite some time. Is it comfortable?"
Step 4: Find a common interest
Observe the appearance of one or more of your conversation partners, including their accessories and any items they carry. Do they have anything in common with you? For instance, stickers on their notebooks featuring characters from their favourite TV series. Or perhaps you notice someone wearing a T-shirt adorned with the logo of the same band whose songs you've enjoyed during breaks. Ask them about it and say that you like it too.
Step 5: Ask open questions
This includes questions that can't be answered with a simple "yes" or "no". For instance, if you ask, "Do you enjoy chips?" the other person might nod. However, if you ask: "What kind of chips do you like?" they will start naming brands or flavours, and you can continue the conversation.
You can also employ clarifying questions, such as asking, "Wow, was that a movie about pirates?" Similarly, you can move from one topic to another to keep the conversation going. For instance, you might say, "Speaking of pirates… Have you read a particular book? I highly recommend it!"
Remember that we are all human, and so are your classmates. Similarly, they experience fears, doubts, and insecurities, seeking understanding and support from others. The key is to stay true to yourself and avoid dishonesty. Sincerity is essential for building lasting and strong friendships. Never change yourself to please others; you'll always encounter "your tribe" without compromising who you are. Perhaps not immediately, but eventually. Life is remarkably unpredictable, and it's essential to remain receptive to new experiences, whether they involve new activities, hobbies, or tastes. Explore various activities, communicate, smile, and enjoy what you do-success will surely follow!
